black and white world

Böhm-Zebras (Equus quagga boehmi) im Vivarium Darmstadt (Hessen, Deutschland) by 4028mdk09

I was looking at the black and white world 
It seemed so exciting
If you'd only put me back to back with that girl
When the night's inviting
With just a little lighting

Miley Cyrus. Just trying to seem all growed up. Surrounded by twats she thinks are her friends who videotape her and then sell it before she has the opportunity to pass out at the party. No one should be outraged that the eighteen year old was partying. Neither Miley nor her "people" should manufacture lame explanations which convince no one. Thank god the internets and facebook weren't prevalent when I was eighteen.

There'll never be days like that again
When I was just a boy and men were men
You never go from moment to moment
You're the living double of a single fiction

I'm still pissed about Carrie Fisher's careless recent "outing" of John Travolta. That is, if she actually outed him. Why is everyone so desperate to label him as either/or? How could labeling anyone anything ever be OK? Why does America want this to be a black and white issue? It's Hollywood people, c'mon. Maybe he likes girls, maybe men, maybe both. Why is no one even considering that he may be bisexual? Why should we care? It's one thing to talk about yourself, to blah blah blah your deepest darkest secrets to the world via twitter or some magazine, but what's with all the finger-pointing? Carrie Fisher should just shut up and so should everyone else. No celebrity or any person owes anyone the intimate details of their intimate details. Sex is not politics. Not for everyone.




You're very colourful with your compliments
As you feel the finger's friction
It's a freeze-frame
Still it's real life
You don't want to look
Cause you've seen the film and you've read the book

As I get older I get more gray, as does the world. Things I was completely convinced about, was sure were black and white when I was in my twenties, now seem to be myriad shades of gray. I know that people can get more rigid as they get older, but happily, at least for now, I'm feeling the opposite. Maybe my opening mind is a result of watching some of life's spools unravel. I can't control what others think, only what I think.

It's more than just a physical attraction
It starts with a face and ends up a fixation
But you're never gonna feel a fraction
Of the way it used to work on your imagination
When you were looking at the black and white world...

Excerpted lyrics from Black and White World by Elvis Costello

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the man with the golden Gunn

I recently downloaded Gunn's Golden Rules, Tim Gunn's latest book, which is a mix of etiquette, gossip, behind-the-scenes at Project Runway and some very personal revelations. It was an enjoyable read, if a bit of a mish-mash. The much-vaunted gossipy put-downs of fashion personalities like Anna Wintour and Isaac Mizrahi were hardly surprising. Vain, overinflated, nasty folks in fashion? Shocker.

Tim Gunn worked in the Parsons admissions office when I was an art student back in the day. I wish I could say I had a wonderful, personal memory, but I just have a vague recollection of a pleasant, laid-back office.


But Gunn is a pleasant force to be reckoned with, and there are some lovely little passages in the book of Gunn-wisdom:

With a certain amount of maturity, we can set up our own constraints. That's a lot of what education is about—letting people set those assignments for us so that when we graduate we can start to set them for ourselves. even now that I'm in my fifties, I still face certain situations where I have to admit that I need some rules to help me figure out what I should do.

I know that someone thought that fashion world gossip would be the selling point, but lots of folks like myself simply love Gunn and the sound of his voice, and I think the book suffered from not having a consistent and clear point of view—something that designers on Project Runway are frequently criticized for. The most interesting revelation was Gunn's personality—he simply cannot lie. His quest for honesty and integrity is fascinating, and I respect it, especially in the industry he has found himself in. His ideas of etiquette and desire to always "take the high road" are refreshing, and it would be nice if some of his colleagues made the same choices. I respect him for being so honest about his feelings about love and sex. I'm not sure I really felt I had to be on such a "need to know" basis—at times I was almost put off by the level of revelation, almost embarrassed. There were some excruciatingly detailed passages, mostly about his youthful love life and bout with depression. Some of his relationship stories just broke my heart—the decisions he made, the roads he took, or more accurately, didn't take. But Gunn puts his money where his mouth is—he said he believes in honesty and he means it. If he's going to tell a story, he's going to tell the whole story. Considering how hard it still is to be young and gay, Gunn's personal stories take on an even stronger meaning—if he can get through a failed suicide attempt and turn his life around time and again, even become a huge success in his fifties—then anyone who is having a hard time should know that it truly does get better. Bravo, Tim Gunn.

That is one thing I try to keep in mind when I talk about people's behavior. I believe very strongly that we should all try our best to treat another well, but I also know that some people who are difficult are doing their best, only their best isn't all that great.

After reading this book, spending time with Gunn, I was drawn again to watch him on Project Runway. I know, I know, I have said in the past that I was done, done, done with the show. Everyone falls off the wagon from time to time. I feel a bit like Pacino in The Godfather, "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in." I don't know if Gunn's self-realizations and revelations have given him a softer edge, but he really seems more the den mother and mother hen for the designers this season than ever before. He actually seems wounded when some are sent home. I started watching about mid-way through the season and couldn't believe the amount of back-biting and bitchiness that was going on in the workroom. There's always diva-like behavior and trash-talking—emotions run high in an artistic environment—but these contestants were re-damn-diculous with their attitudes. Especially bee-otchey were the women. The guys also wanted to dish the dirt, but no one seemed to get as down and dirty as the women. And not just critical, but nasty.

The mob mentality picked a whipping boy this season, Michael Costello. I'm not sure what set it all off, as I said I had missed earlier episodes, but from everything I could see Costello, although possibly not the most talented of the bunch (that's Mondo, without a doubt), at least was trying to do his best and didn't seem to want to engage in the nastiness. I'm sure a lot of the worst offenders will claim that they look bad in "the editing," but the show's editors did not make Gretchen and April consistently say derogatory things about whatever garment Costello was working on, or pull disdainful expressions whenever the judges praised his work.

What was great was when it all came to a head in a recent episode when queen bitch (and ousted former contestant brought back for one episode) Ivy started throwing around accusations of Costello cheating, in a pretty obvious attempt to get some camera-drama-time. Papa Gunn swept in, and in his inimitable, unflappable, style put a quash on all the nastiness, saying that whatever was said (by the girls in the girls' room!) was a non-issue. Taking the high road again, discussion over. High school's over, bitches, get used to it. Thanks to the positive force that is Tim Gunn and the upbeat designs of Mondo, I am enjoying watching Project Runway again, cattiness notwithstanding.

Fashion and art can be fun and uplifting. Even nice, sometimes.

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why celebrity sucks

The "internets" can be a glorious thing, connecting new folks, reacquainting old friends, globally linking art, music, science, providing tons of useful and useless information, opening avenues of expression, etc., etc. But the wealth of information can be too much, too. All of this 24-7 access is erasing any notions we have of privacy. If you're perpetually plugged in, when can you turn it off? Can you ever?

The fact that Steve Jobs had to issue a statement about his health today pisses me off immeasurably. And this sort of online dredging and continuation of the speculation makes me sick. I know that Jobs is the godlike figurehead of Apple, and so much of its recent resurgence can be traced to him, so of course the industry attaches importance to the possibility of a change of power at the helm. But he's a person, too, with a family, who shouldn't have to talk about his health until (and if) he's ready to.

What is a "celebrity's" responsibility to the public? Should the Travoltas have to release a succession of statements after the tragic death of their son? Should the public try to tear apart the wording of all of these statements, and if unsatisfied, speculate as to their accuracy? At such a confusing and unhappy time how accountable should they be? Why shouldn't they put out their version for the masses? What do they owe us? And why is the "internets" more interested in the parents' private romantic lives than the story at hand?

Of course both of these stories are dramatic and interesting. But the vulture-like death watch and seamy interpretation of a minor's death leave a bad taste in the mouth. I have been interested in the lives of the rich and famous, like anyone else, I suppose. When I lived in NYC I saw more famous people than I can count. Some I actually was lucky enough to speak to, or have small interactions with, like David Bowie, Steve Martin. Some were pleasant and charming surprises, like Richard Gere, Sharon Stone. Some I just happily caught a glimpse of: Michael Caine, Andy Warhol, Mick Jones, Jean-Michel Basquiat, Michael Palin.

Sometimes it's best not to meet an idol, you might be disappointed when you encounter them in real life, as they might be too real. But it was always fun, that moment of recognition. Of course the internet wasn't really happening then. If there were rumors floating, they were by word-of-mouth, and folks treated them with the proper seriousness or disdain, depending on the current blood-alcohol level of the moment in question. But today, with the internet, and anyone being able to write and post anything about anyone, this sort of gossiping has just gotten out of hand. No matter how full of b.s. a statement is, somehow, when it is in "print," it carries more weight.

This all reminds me of a story my dad once told me, about when he was a political reporter for the Newark Daily News. He was on the beat in Trenton, N.J., and was hanging out with the other reporters, probably pals from the Asbury Park Press, Star Ledger, etc., when someone burst into the room and announced that so-and-so politician, who had earlier delivered a speech, was currently upstairs in the hotel with a girl, not his wife. My dad said the reporters all looked at each other and then told the guy to get lost. That wasn't news, and it just wasn't done.

I guess many people would think that we need more transparency, and my dad and his colleagues were "covering it up," or something. I'm not sure. Politicians are after power, always have been, always will. Sex and sexual liaisons come with the power, for some. I'm not naive, so the situation doesn't shock me. I'm not sure how relevant that politician's affair or fling was, however, to anyone but he and his wife and the woman upstairs with him.

I'm not advocating for us to all stick our heads in the sand. But human nature, and its frailties, are a given. What we have a choice about is whether we want to help stir the mud.