Thursday, January 08, 2009

do I expect too much?

From people, I mean.

Case in point. Yesterday my boss took her "crew" out to lunch - the folks most responsible for keeping her sane and getting the work out there - you know, the shlubs - me and a few other folks. Anyway, she took us out to lunch at a nice restaurant where we had appetizers, an entrée, dessert, the whole nine yards.

We have been working (for years) to try and coalesce this group into a real team. The cast of characters of course has changed over the years, but a few key players have remained, including me. Now I should add that I have no illusions. These people are not my friends. Nor would I really want them to be. I have other friends here at work. But still, you want to get along with folks who you are forced to work closely together for an ungodly amount of time each day when you would rather be with your family or shopping or sleeping, right?

I noticed during the course of the quite-long lunch that a few times when I was starting to say something someone else just interuppted or started talking. Hmmm. Now, this of course happens with family and friends, too (I'm guilty!), but when you're with your pals you can say, "Hey, I was talkin'!" or something even ruder and not worry. Not so much at a work luncheon. So I went back to my soup or my scallops and sighed inwardly.

But the real kicker came after the lunch, as we all got up to go. I asked and was directed to the ladies room. The others had all checked their long, heavy, coats and I had mine, so I figured I would dash in while they retrieved theirs and meet them out front and walk back to work. You know what happened. They all ditched me and took off.

Why am I the only one surprised? None of this behavior was pointed, just thoughtless. Was I kidding myself that the fact that we were in a posh setting that manners and civilty might ensue? Am I over-reacting? Do I expect too much? Am I a dinosaur? I just know I wouldn't have walked off, leaving one of them. Team, my ass.

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